Answers, Part III

Okay, this is the last of them, I promise. Also, I have to do the six word thing, which I’m super late on b/c Tracy tagged me a few days ago. I’ll get to it, I promise.

What are your favorite activities when you travel with your mother?

Good question, Mimi! You know, I think both of our very favorite thing to do is talk. We can sit and gab about anything and everything all night long! We love going away together and just having that uninterrupted time to visit. We also love to shop, visit museums (although as an artist, my mom loves this more), see new places, visit gardens, walk around old, quaint neighborhoods and look at the homes, and so much more. I loved having her in DC with us because we did so much fun stuff. We really enjoy exploring and we both like to walk places (vs. drive), so it makes for fun times. Oh, and how could I forget? We both (obviously) love to eat good food and have a glass of really great wine. This is embarrassing to admit, but during my first year of law school, we met in San Francisco over my spring break week and I managed to gain eight pounds in less than a week from all of the good food and good wine, courtesy of my mom b/c I was one broke law school student. So in retrospect, I see it was totally her fault that I had to lose that weight. The worst part is that we honestly walked at least 20 miles a day, so what does that say about what we ate/drank???

Are we ever going to get together for a play date?

Of course, Kelley! Let’s pick a day and place. We’re flexible! because, well, we don’t have lives. I know you said Saturdays are best for you, so let me know which one works for you.

How does your hair always look so good?

Jen, I swear, you’re my new best friend. That is possibly the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. I feel like I have the worst hair ever and I’m so damn lazy I pull it back 28 days a month. The key is not washing it. No, really, I’m serious. It’s much better on the second and and third day! Don’t worry, I shower every day, I just don’t wash my hair. This has become very normal since Mattix. On “wash days,” I dry it with the round brush and the paddle brush (I have horribly wavy/frizzy hair; I’m one of those people who is angry at the world b/c I don’t have either stick straight hair or super curly hair; being in the middle sucks). Blow drying takes forever – yet another reason not to wash it often. While I don’t agree that it looks good, nasty a$$ hair with a bit of hair spray does stay in place quite well. I like to call it my helmet head, but I don’t have to wear a helmet to get it. It was so bad one day that I patted the top of my head for some reason and a poof of baby powder came flying out. I have no shame.

What was going on with your health back in May or was it June? Did I miss a post?

No, Shannon, you didn’t miss a post. I just never wrote about it b/c it was long and pretty boring!  However, if you’re good and bored, you can go HERE and read it. I PW protected it just ’cause. It’s my regular PW in case anyone cares to read, but I promise it’s boring.

Are you on the Ethiopia yahoo group?

Yes, I am, but I’m having a hard time “getting into it” for a lot of reasons. That’s something I’ll write about soon because I’m overwhelmed with it. Thanks for bringing it up, because I think writing about it will help me work through it. Hopefully I’ll get to that this weekend.

What is your favorite VNese food?

Do I have to pick one???? I truly love VNese food. I love it because it’s so good and I love it because there’s so much I can eat (most VNese foods are naturally gluten free). I mean, I love VNese food. I drove Mattix and myself 30 minutes each way the other night, when he was super cranky, in traffic, for VNese take out because both of us love it that much. Ed loves it, to, but he wasn’t here to enjoy it. Then after Ed’s vasectomy on Friday, I drove through Wal*green’s to pick up his pain meds so he had nothing to complain about while he sat in the car and I went into the that same restaurant and ordered dinner. It was only three miles from the doctor’s office and this is not an opportunity you waste!  

Mattix’s favorite food is chicken pho. He can pack down half a bowl on his own sometimes. My favorites are VNese pancakes, spring rolls, pho, lemon grass chicken, goi ga (chicken salad), anything made in a clay pot, and a whole list of things. I love fish sauce in an unnatural way. I’m pretty convinced it goes on just about anything.  Oh, and VNese coffee. I am freaking addicted to that stuff. I hate Star*bucks now because nothing from there tastes anything like VNese coffee. I was strung out on it while we were in VN. I drank several a day (and still lost weight…I’m telling you, I need to move!).

Everyone I know is trying out VNese food as well because I take all of my friends and family out to our favorite restaurants. When we had to have our doctor’s medical letter for our Ethiopia dossier notarized, I took our good family friend who came  to the appointment with us to act as our notary out for VNese food for the favor – our very favorite restaurant was just five miles from the office. Never mind where she might have wanted to eat…the woman had no choice! I’ve taken  most of my friends go with me at least once and I have yet to hear someone say they don’t like it. My family members are all converts, too. Oh, and Ed kicks butt with VNese cooking. My friend Allison sent us a cookbook a LONG time ago and Ed has been mastering the recipes ever since. People actually ask to be invited over when he’s going to cook out of it! So, yeah, we’re a little crazy for that stuff around here.

 

Protected: Answer to S’s question…

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password:

Answers, Part II: Names and birth culture

My answers to the following to questions, particularly the second, were pretty long, so there will be one more “Answers” post following this one.  BTW, thanks for reminding me why I posted pics of my fridge, Carolyn! Now I remember taking those photos of Mattix sitting on the bottom section. That seems like a long time ago.  He was doing it again the other day and was very annoyed at me when I made him move so that I could close it; he was hanging out there drinking milk and eating crackers.

How did you decide on the name, Mattix? Do you get a lot of comments about Brangelina’s Cambodian son being named Maddox?

Good question, Laurie, and I didn’t take either one of your questionsas rude. I talked about how we named him, but it’s been a while so I’ll do it again. My little brother’s name it Matthew. We’ve called him Matt for his entire life. Well, I’ve mainly called him Punk, Punka$$, and bi*tch, but I also call him Matt. (He and I are equally cursed with dirty mouths and strange senses of humor. You wouldn’t even want to know what he calls me…) Anyway, I’m very close to my brother, as is Ed. I feel blessed to have a brother like him. And now that we have Mattix, there’s nobody else I’d ever name my son after because my brother just loves him that much. And Mattix loves my brother.

Anyway, going back a long, long time, I’ve loved the name Maddox for a boy and Maddison for a girl for a while. When I was younger, I wanted to name a son Zachary, but then I eventually decided on Maddox. Ed and I were struck with Maddison while at a vet’s office with our sick puppy over eight years ago.  A golden retriever named Maddison really did it for us. We both looked at each other and were like, “That’s an awesome name for a girl!” So, we decided on Maddox and Maddison. (Keep in mind Ed and I have been together for over nine years.)  I also knew that I’d adopt, I just did not know from where at the time. And then Angelina came along and stole my name for her adopted kid.  I was annoyed when it happened. When it came time to name Mattix, I again expressed my irritation about the situation, so when we were discussing names and I mentioned that I’d like to name Mattix after my brothersomehow, whether it was a first or middle name, Ed suggested screwing with the spelling of Maddox so that we could keep the name I’d always liked, while still naming him after my brother. I would have given Mattix my brother’s exact name, but Ed didn’t want to do that. So, there you have it. I’m not sure who came up with the final spelling. We threw a few options around, but liked Mattix the most.

Not related to your question; he has a handful of nicknames, but the one that has stuck the longest is “Bug.” My mom started calling him that after our second set of photos waaayyy back in March 2007 (the 16th, to be exact, when he was one month and two days old). He looked like a perfect little bug and I think he still does. It must be those big, round, beautiful eyes and that precious face.

In fact, I think he looks more like a cute little bug now! My mom said he looks like one of those adorable animated bugs from the Disney movie A Bug’s Life! I agree. I think that THIS photo really shows that.  

He and I have a little game, wherein he says “Ma ma” and I say, “Bug bug” and he gets louder and I get louder and we do it until one of us cracks up. I love that. He has responded to “Bug” for a long time.

We also call him Matty, but my dad says we have to stop that soon because it’s too girly and he’s getting older. Whatever. The one thing that did do was assure our future daughter that her name will not be Maddison, because the nickname for Maddison is Maddy and that sounds awfully similar to Matty, doesn’t it? No worries. We have ideas. And really, it’s probably better that we didn’t end up choosing our child’s name because a Golden Retriever rocked it so well.  

Back to his name. We knew we’d get the comments and figured Mattix would get a few when he’s older, too, but I don’t think it’s the end of the world. We do get them here and there, but not too terribly, at least not nearly as often as the really ignorant, rude ones, such as the woman in World Market the other day who asked me where I had to go to get him.  The naming issue doesn’t bother me nearly as much. In fact, it really doesn’t bother me at all. I knew we were setting ourselves up for comments.  My good friend from law school said the funniest thing ever when I told him we were adopting from ET. He’s a smart a$$ and we have a brother-sister relationship. He said, “So, how are you going to change the spelling of Zahara?” So, obviously, it doesn’t bother me; I just hope it doesn’t become a problem for Mattix.

Is birth culture something you consider important in raising internationally adopted kids, and if so, how do you plan on incorporating 2 very different cultures into your home?

Yes, this is EXTREMELY important to both Ed and me. Very, very important. So much so that it was something we had to spend a lot, lot, lot of time discussing when it became apparent we would no longer pursue a second adoption from VN. Kind of random, but we rec’d the July copy of Adoptive Families right after we sent in our dossier that had an article on deciding to adopt the second time. There was a discussion on this very issue and we had covered all of the topics, plus more, before we committed. We started talking about this very seriously back in January and “finished up” (meaning become completely comfortable with it) around May, I think.

You know, it’s interesting because I’ve found that a lot of people seem to think that if both kids are from the same region of the world, say, any two Asian countries, that a lot of the issues surrounding raising children form different countries are diminished. Erica talked about it once – that just because both of her future children will be Asian does NOT mean that they will not have very different backgrounds. I was so glad to see someone addressing that. A SW and I talked about it a long time ago, as her children are from China and Korea (I think). The child from Korea apparently gets “lumped” with the child from China because so many children are adopted from China and it’s not easy for her .

Anyway, very interesting stuff, so while our children of course will be from hugely different backgrounds, I don’t see it as a infinitely more challenging than adopting children from two different countries who look more similar. Society in general probably won’t see it that way, but as far as us prioritizing our children’s birth cultures, I don’t think it will be impossible.   And again, the society that may think it’s all well and good when children are from the same region of the world is the same one that asks me things like, “Where’d ya get him?” and “Do you also want your own?” So, the opinion of society as a whole is not the one keeping me up at night. Would it be “easier” to adopt both children from the same country? Of course, for so many reasons. While we originally hoped to be able to do that,  it wasn’t an option because even though we started our first process just as VNreopened, we chose an agency with a very long wait list and then we waited an unusually long time for travel so that by the time we were home, we weren’t in a position to return. And this isn’t the place for it, but quite honestly, I would not pursue an adoption from VN right now, at this very moment, even if it were an option. 

Anyway, all of that said, it will be a challenge. Ed and I are bothvery committed to incorporating birth culture in a number of ways, including integrating ourselves into our children’s communities the best that we can. This is something we need to put more effort into now that we can actually leave the house with some regularity. In the future, it’s just going to take twice the time and twice the effort. I mentioned this first because this is the thing that will challenge me the most, I believe. This is a post in and of itself. Furthermore, I want my children to learn about their own and each other’s birth country, history, country’s religion(s), language(s) (including speaking them, if they’re so inclined), culture, race, etc., through reading, returning to their birthcountries when the time is right (for me, that would be right now if it were an option), speaking with adults from their respective countries, and other means. For example,  Ed and I would like to host exchange students from each of our children’s birth countries down the road. This is something we’re committed to doing when the time is right and our kids are a bit older so long as it fits into our family. I’m very confident that it will.

My main concern with having two children, each from vastly different cultures, is how well one child will fare with the other’sculture and birth country. I didn’t want to adopt a child from a country where I couldn’t bring my other child when we return to visit. While I know our choice won’t make that the easiest, it can be done.  Furthermore, we now have the issue of where to live, should we decide it is prudent to leave our largely Caucasian neighborhood. It may mean moving to a new state for us, and that’s something we’re actually talking about right now, at this very moment, after vising our friends in another state where diversity is much more common in neighborhoods, even ones like ours in the suburbs, which is where I like to live.  It’s no longer a matter of moving into an area with more Vietnamese or even Asian individuals. It’s a matter of moving into a neighborhood with both a larger VNese and/or Asian population AND Ethiopian or black population. In our current state, to my knowledge, that’s probably not a feasible option.

My other main concern with choosing ET is that it’s not an ideal place for me to travel. Not one of my doctors is supportive ofmy decision to travel there, in fact, but I refuse to adopt a child from a country that I cannot or will not visit. It’s important for Ed and me to see and experience our children’s birth countries, even if the amount of time we spend there is not as long as we’d like. No, I’m not going to be able to convey much at all to my children one day about their country of birth from the limited amount of time I’ll spend there, but I do want to be able to experience even a little bit of it so I can appreciate the country that offered me one of its children to raise. And, like I mentioned earlier, Ed and I are very much NOT of the mindset that we have our kids, mission accomplished, we’re outta there. If time, money, and life were not impediments, I’d be in VN right now for an extended period of time, probably putting effort into making particular orphanages better – at least minimally decent – places for the children to live.

So, there’s the short answer to a very good question with more complex answers that are far more intricate than I made them out to be.

Answers, Part I

Thanks for the interesting and funny questions! Here I go…

What do you love to indulge in?

I wish I had an answer that made me seem more intelligentor ambitious. But, I don’t. I love chocolate and pedicures! Before Mattix, I didn’t indulge in too much of the former, but more of the latter. Since Mattix came home, the two seem to have flip flopped and it’s not going well. I have a fat a$$ and crusty feet. I’m working on that. My mom and I were horrible. We had pedicures just before we left for Laguna, then we had them again once we were there. And I’ve cut waaayyy back on the chocolate, which is a hard habit to break, while at the same time getting back into the exercise routine I used to have, back when I had time to have it! Also, I should mention that I love massages. Last month, I had my first massage since the one I had in VN, which you can read about HERE . (Scroll down and start reading under the word “Tuesday,” which is written in caps and in red. I feel this is a must read for anyone who is going to VN and might be thinking about a massage. Consider yourself warned.) I use the term “massage” in relation to that experience very, very, very loosely.

How do you keep your refrigerator so clean?

I watched Sleeping with the Enemy when I was young and took notes. I organize the fridge, then if Ed or anyone messes it up, I beat the hell out of them. If it’s Ed that did it, afterwards, I buy him lingerie and flowers and we… Just kidding, and I’m not trying to make light of DV.  That’s funny that anyone noticed b/c I didn’t even know I had posted photos showing the inside of my fridge. I have to go through my blog and figure out why in the world I would have done that. I really am a freak, aren’t I? I don’t really have to put any effort into it other than keeping it cleared of “old” food. I go through it every few days and make sure nothing needs to be tossed. Nothing, well, other than poo, makes me want to vomit more than smelly, icky, spoiled food in the fridge.  I wipe it out once in a while.  Before I put away new groceries, I clean out the fridge so that everything I buy can go in neatly. Yeah, I’m a loser.  Keep in mind that as of now, it’s just Ed and me in the fridge and once I have something organized, Ed’s pretty good about putting things back where they go. I have nightmares about when the kids grow up and mess with my fridge. I never knew I could write a full paragraph on the current state of my fridge. Wow, I get more and more awesome by the day. Being a mom has made my life more exciting than I ever could have imagined. Calm yourselves, folks, because my life really is that cool.

Have you thought about how you are going to prepare Mattix for a sibling?

Yes, we have. We’re going to tell him that his new little sister is a dog, which will ensure endless love, adoration, hugs, and kisses.  We’ve sort of discussed it, but if I’m being honest, we’re hoping that when it’s time, he’ll be a little older, more verbal, and therefore we can come up with a good strategy. ‘Cause right now, I think the dog thing would be our best bet.

Is Mattix talking much yet?

Yes and no. His talking is strange. The following words are the ones he uses all the time that I can come up with off the top of my head: dog, mama, dada, baba (bottle), bubu (bubbles), grandma, bye bye, uh uh (no), uh ohhhhh, and oh wow. There may be a few I’m missing, but those are his most frequent words and he says them all day. However, he often repeats a word as clear as day. He has repeated cracker, Gidget, Mattix, baby,  and a lot of other words. It’s crazy because he never repeats a word that you ask him to, and once he repeats a word on his own , he may or may not repeat it again in the future. But when he does it, I swear, it freaks everyone out because the word he repeats is as CLEAR as day. It’s not, “Oh, that sounded like cracker, I think. Was that cracker?  Did you hear that?” It’s more, “What the hell? He just said cracker.” The last person who evaluated him said he was right on target for a child his age, but I don’t know whether that’s the case any more. Perhaps he should have more words at this age, as compared to a child who has been hearing English for nearly 18 months? I’m not concerned because the fact of the matter is that he has only been hearing English for slightly less than eight months. So, we’re going to give it a bit more time before taking any corrective measures, if we even need them.

Does he still love on his toy worm?

Oh yes, so much so that Glow Worm’s batteries died; he no longer glows or sings. I have to put new batteries in GW now that I’m thinking about it. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, you can go HERE or HERE or HERE (for the full series, scroll down about 2/3 of the way on the last link) for the details. I put GWin Mattix’s crib, so I avert my eyes from the video monitor when he and GW get, um, close. However, Mattix entertains a handful of special friends, including his first stuffie, Pink Piggie, Monkey, Bobo, Bear, and one more I can’t think of right now. He’s a busy, busy man. Not how I intend to raise him, as we’re all about monogamy in this house, but maybe this is just a phase and he’ll outgrow it.

When are you going to get a video camera and post video of your adorable little man?

Yeah, this is bad. We have a video camera. We bought a new one before VN. We’ve used it exactly four times. The first when we met Mattix in VN at the orphanage, the second later that night at the hotel, the third to capture video of the traffic in Saigon, and the fourth when he first started walking. You’re going to think I’m lying, but we’ve never watched a second of what we’ve recorded. I don’t know what our deal is; we literally have thousands of photos of Mattix since VN, but we suck at using the video camera. I’ll work on that.

What is your favorite thing to do with Mattix?

What a great question, Chandra (not that the others are not great). Hmmm. That’s hard. Up until recently, Mattix and I didn’t do anything super exciting because we were spending most of our time (and Ed when he wasn’t at work) cocooned at home, working on a lot of attachment related “stuff.” Once he got comfortable with us, my favorite thing was rocking him. For a while – I will not lie – it was my least favorite because it was terribly traumatic for him and therefore stressful for me. Nobody feels good about restraining an infant in their arms while he kicks the hell out of you and growls. However, as things progressed, he really started to enjoy being rocked and it became my favorite thing to do, both at naps and bedtime. It was always very calm and sweet and the way he would reach up and rub my cheek…makes me want to cry just thinking about it. And just like that, he outgrew it. He prefers to go into his bed and fall asleep now. Bedtime has become very easy, but I’m sad and I miss the rocking.

I guess my new favorite activity is Little Gym because Mattix has such a blast and I never knew how much fun I’d have watching him have a blast, even if it means I jump and dance around like the total DBag I swore I’d never become before I was a mom. I also love just playing on the floor with him because he’s super creative and fun, and he backs his little butt up every five minutes to sit in my lap for 30 seconds. It think it’s very precious. He started playing some serious pretend about three months ago, and I also love that. It began during one of his dumpster diving episodes. Yup, he dumpster dives. Anyway, he pulled an empty cereal box out of the recycle, walked into the living room with it, and pretended to pour little piles of cereal onto the table. Then he pretended to eat them and share them with me. Since then, he’s become quite the talented pretender and I love playing along. His favorite game of pretend involves going into my wallet drawer, pulling out all of my wallets, and then pretending to pull out imaginary credit cards and hand them to me. I feel as though this doesn’t speak well of me: my son’s favorite pretend activities are eating and spending money. I’m not looking very shiny right now, am I?

Do you and Ed get much time alone now that Mattix is home?

Not much, but a tiny bit here and there. And we both enjoy it very much. When we do have time together, we like to go to lunch and a movie. Oh yeah, I said lunch, because the time we have together is generally in the afternoon. We’re far too old and tired to stay out at night more than once every six months!  While I think it’s VERY important for couples to have time to themselves, even just a little, we also now realize how much we enjoy our family time.

What is your favorite thing to do when you get time to yourself?

Um, sleep. I’m being sincere and honest. If I have an hour to myself, I like to sleep.  I long for the day when I actually don’t feel so tired all the time and when I can enjoy actual activities during my “own” time. I used to love to workout and I had the time to do it. That would be the reason that one year ago today, I was 15-20 pounds lighter and much healthier.  Now, when it comes down to an hour at the gym or an hour in bed…well, I usually don’t have time for either. I do love to read and research, both things I know about and things I don’t. I like to learn, so much so that I almost went back to grad school right afer I finished law school. I applied to two programs and gained admittance to both, then chose the one I thought I would really like. I even went to orientation, but I had a moment of clarity and left during lunch! I love taking classes and hope to enroll in a photography class this fall at our local community college.  I also like to read garbage magazines about fashion, celebrities, fitness, etc.. (Ha ha ha, you say, to the last thing on my list. I know, I know.) Oh, and of course reading blogs and writing on mine.

In addition to the clean fridge, how do you keep your entire house so friggin’ spotless?

This is the time I fess up to having a house cleaner. Before you all jump to conclusions, let me explain. I’ve pretty much always kept my house clean, even when I had didn’t have a housekeeper and when I had NO time because I was in school, working, and usually both. I’m not sure it’s friggin’ spotless, although I’m quite flattered. However, a few years back, when I wasn’t feeling well, Ed decided we were hiring help because he was tired of seeing me wear myself out cleaning all of the time. I’m sorta weird about cleaning. It’s not clean unless the blinds, the baseboards, the cracks, the corners, etc., are all clean.  It takes a long time to do all of that. I got a little spoiled with the help, even though I continued to clean in between. Now, they come every two or three weeks and I clean all the “easy” stuff in between, which means I don’t have to do the blinds, baseboards, windows, and tedious dusting. The rest, I do pretty regularly.

It really doesn’t take up too much time if I keep up for the most part. I run the cordless hard floor vacuum almost every morning all over the downstairs. Mattix pushes his little El*mo vacuum along with me until he decides it is time to “trade,” then he pushes the real one for two minutes before getting bored and throwing it on the floor. I hate dirty floors. I run the Dy*son upstairs in the loft regularly, but the less used rooms – the office, the guest room, etc., don’t need it as much.  I hate dirty dishes in the sink, so I run the dishwasher every night and put them away in the morning after Mattix has breakfast and has enough of an unassisted attention span to give me a few minutes, although he always goes for the knives and he’s a fast one. I clean the guest bathroom every few days, because there’s nothing worse than going to someone’s house and having to use an icky bathroom with a moldy toilet (sorry if anyone has a moldy toilet; it just grosses me out)! It takes five minutes b/c nobody really uses the shower in the third bathroom with the exception of my mom or our occasional overnight guests. It doesn’t take long to clean the kitchen counters and appliances off every few days.

Can I stop now? I’m not as freakish as this is making me sound, I promise. I had to sit here and think about all of this because it really is routine and doesn’t take a ton of time. The thing with cleaning is that if I can stay ahead of it, it’s not too bad. I’m not clinically OCD or anything, but I’ll admit to having some “issues.” I’ve gotten a LOT better about it, but if you could see my dresser drawers or closet, you might think I should be medicated. I shouldn’t; I’m just saying you might think that. I don’t want to sound like a cleaning nazi or anything, because I’m not.   Don’t worry, there are times when my house is a friggin’ disaster, but it causes me enough  stress that I get it together fairly quickly. After Vietnam and again after we came home from DC, it was terrifying around here.

Mattix always comes first and I’m not one of those moms that prioritizes cleaning or a clean house by any stretch of the imagination, nor do I prevent Mattix from doing stuff because I’m afraid he’ll make a mess. That kid is the king of messes and that’s just part of having children. My kitchen floor is often covered in a sticky film from all the bubbles we blow during the day because he yells “Bu bu!” about ten times a day.  He makes colossal messes – both dirt and things – and I don’t care. I wouldn’t want him to grow up in an environment that is sterile and restrictive.  In fact, there are some days when the house is messy/dirty all day long, and occasionally, until the next day. Mattix wreaks havoc during the day and I try to pick it up at night after he’s in bed, but sometimes I’m too worn out. Ed’s good about cleaning up, too, but of course he doesn’t share my, um, tendencies.

So there you have it. Again, keep in mind it’s just the three of us and I do. not. cook. Cooking is a time consuming thing and I don’t spend time on it.  The best way I can explain it is that some people cook because they enjoy it, others cook because they enjoy the results, and some would rather starve than cook. I’m in the last category (notice I’m not starving, though). While I wouldn’t say I truly enjoy cleaning, I enjoy the results. I’d rather clean the toilet with my bare hands and tongue than cook dinner, so I clean!  

Okay, there’s an essay on my cleaning habits! I’m not nearly as crazy as I’m sure I just made myself sound…so I’ll stop for today. I’ll post the second half tomorrow or the next day, if you’re bored enough at work to finish reading.

 

Follow up to Acropustulosis post (yeah, equally exciting)

(photo at end)

First of all, thank you so much for the kind comments on my last post. I truly appreciate it. I didn’t mean to come off as dramatic or anything; like I said, I have some unresolved issues and this just sent me over the edge.  This is not extremely serious, besides the horrible discomfort (I’m pretty sure I was clear on that) and there are worse things to deal with (trust me, we’ve dealt with things much worse than this), but this latest flare up was the straw that broke the camel’s back for me. It was timing, mostly, because I’m really starting to address some of my own feelings at this time – ones I’ve chosen not to think about at length until recently, probably because I haven’t had the time or energy - and because this particular flareup was so bad. Like I said, I’m not dramatic about medical issues; if you know me, you know that. Otherwise, I’d have been huge drama my entire life! Instead, I tend to minimize things. However, it’s hard to do that when it’s your child. During the past seven months, I’ve come to understand what my mom has always said: that you’d do anything in the world to take away your child’s pain and you wish it were you experiencing it instead.

To add to what I said yesterday (or to explain more), when we picked Mattix up at the orphanage, he was truly infested with scabies. Infested is the only word I can come up with that might accurately describe it. I thought that I had written at length about the scabies before on my blog, but I realized that it was on a message board. I think. Maybe I already did it here. I can’t remember; I’ve gone stupid since becoming a mom. If you’ve already heard this or don’t care (and I mean it), skip it b/c it’s boring. 

We received photos of Mattix from the time he was three weeks old during our wait for travel and I was sure that he had scabies on and off over the nine months  (probably more often than not). He also had other nasty things, like what appeared to be horrible staph infections, but that’s not the point of this. When we finally met him, I *knew* he was covered in scabies. It was really strange, though, because his body was COVERED but his face was clear. It looked as though someone had treated his face but not his body. I’m not suggesting that, but it sure looked that way. His face was absolutely clear. Anyway, I had no doubt he had scabies (neither did Karen about her son), but our in-country staff person suggested we wait until we went to the international clinic to have a doctor examine him. She said that sometimes the babies have terrible rashes from the heat and the swaddling/extreme wrapping that they often use in the orphanages and that it might take a few days, skin moisturizer, and A/C to resolve.

We waited two days until we could get an appointment at the international clinic (SOS, I think). The doctor there INSISTED he did NOT have scabies.  So, we still didn’t treat him. After we’d been with him for five days or so, *I* caught the scabies. Mind you, research indicates that scabies is more easily transmitted to people with weakened immune systems, so that would explain why I caught them so quickly (twice) and Ed never did. Anyway, at that point, we treated all three of us, but I was too conservative with the permethrin (generic for Elimite) on Mattix. I was so afraid of getting it into his eyes that I went too light on his face.  I knew better, but I made a poor decision anyway. His face ended up entirely infested; the scabies basically relocated to the “clean” area of his body. It was horrible. I posted very few photos of his face when it got really bad while we were in VN.  When we brought him home, everyone, including our pediatrician, thought he would likely scar. The first thing my dad said when he met us at the airport was, “Oh my God. What happened to his face?”  Welcome home!

It took another three or four weeks to completely get rid of them. We did at least five loads of laundry each day. I stripped all the beds every day, washed ever last towel in our home every day, vacuumed several times a day, and kept everything super clean (if you can’t tell, I’m a semi-neat freak as it is). We had to retreat him a handful of times and that was also horrible. Because the scabies were more concentrated in certain areas after my inappropriately applying the cream (because of my hesitation since we’d been told he didn’t have scabies by two different people I felt like, at the time, would have known more than me), he was in a terrible amount of discomfort. Putting the permethrin cream over the open, scratched up wounds was very painful. One of us had to hold him down while the other did the dirty work. He screamed bloody murder, and at the time, this kid had a pain tolerance like no other. I had to treat myself a few more times because I caught them again as well. (BTW, my having them was NOTHING like Mattix having them. I just want to be clear. I treated myself both times as soon as I caught them. Poor Mattix had been infested for over ten months at that point.) We were thankful they finally resolved because if they had not, we were going to have to move on to the oral treatment, which I did not want to do.

Anyway, that was our prior experience with Scabies, and now the poor little guy has been dealing with this acropustulosis since then. This recent flare up is not isolated; it’s just the worst, by far, and the most painful. Like I said yesterday, acropustulosis is not common knowledge and we’re very fortunate to have our dermatologist who knew exactly what it was. His extensive and frequent international travel to countries where scabies – very, very bad cases of it, not just minor ones where a person receives treatment in a reasonable amount of time – are common, obviously made this easy for him to diagnose. He sees it often, just not here.   

I wanted to follow up to what I wrote yesterday because I kept it pretty general. According to our derm and everything I’ve read (which has been everything I can find), the “information” out there is inconsistent and not always accurate because it’s not common knowledge. While children who have never had scabies can develop it, it is the opinion of our dermatologist that the reason Mattix developed it was because of his ten month plus losing battle with scabies. Furthermore, much of the information indicates that the outbreaks become less and less severe each time. I can assure you that is not true in every case.  They seem to get worse each time for Mattix. And finally, the research available indicates that children usually outgrow it by age three. Again, we were informed, and I found a lot of anecdotal evidence indicating,  children often suffer from it beyond three years of age.  Sometimes well beyond.

Finally, Mattix also has terrible eczema. Poor little guy has scars on his stomach, chest, back and arms from the eczema outbreaks that occurred before we were with him. However, at this very moment, we’ve been fortunate to get it under fairly good control. While I of course wish that he didn’t have to deal with eczema b/c it is obviously very painful and terrible and no mom wants their child to deal with anything uncomfortable, I feel like this is very different.

Anyway, Mattix had a horrible night last night, but by morning, the cream and ointment had worked wonders. I wish I would have taken a before picture; a blog friend asked for a photo so that she could compare Mattix’s condition to her child’s. I sent it to her, but I’m posting it here, too. It is from this morning, about 12 hours after the first application.  It looks a million times better, but maybe it will give anyone who is interested an idea. This is the best I could do. I didn’t have anyone to help hold him down and as you know, this boy never stops moving! I have about 15 blurry ones and this one semi-clear one. His hands actually look worse, but it was easier for me to hold his foot still than his hands with little wiggly fingers!

I started answering questions, but once again, the length got away from me. I’ll post that tomorrow. Again, I wasn’t trying to bi*tch here, but rather to share our experience in case anyone had or has something similar. There are two ladies who had been there before us that helped me tremendously when we came home and were first figuring this (and a LOT of other) stuff out and working through it. You know who you are and I thank you if you’re reading.

Q and A tomorrow, which is also the day Ed has his vasectomy. Good times at our house!

Back to Reality and Acropustulosis

I’m back to the scorching heat after a really nice four days. But for the most important person in the world, waiting for me to come home, we would have without a doubt stayed for another week. The weather was perfect, the beach beautiful, the shopping amazing, the show (Pageant of the Masters) fantastic (I’ve seen it many times and it just gets better each year), and of course the company the best! My mom and I had a blast. I talked to Mattix on the phone several times a day. So much so that whenever he wanted to talk to me, he pointed to Ed’s Crackberry and yelled, “Mama, Mama” until Ed would call me. Then Mattix and I would chat. I only understood every fifth or so word, which was of course “Mama,” and the kisses into the phone. I never got tired of the calls. And the welcome home? Oh, it made it worth it to leave. Amazing how an 18 month old can make one feel like the most special and significant person to walk the earth. Love it! Oh, and now Mattix grabs his play phones, says “Mama” a few times, fakes laughs his a$$ off, and talks up a storm. He also does it with every real phone he sees, including the one in the doctor’s office waiting room today. Never mind that I’m sitting right next to him. Too damn cute.

On a low note, Mattix’s acropustulosis is back with a vengeance. It is FAR worse than it has been to date. So, yeah, nearly eight months later and the poor kid is still dealing with the the long term effects of crap care. Yup, I said it. Crap care. Gasp. I no longer desire to censor my feelings. I won’t go on and on at this point, but needless to say, I’m not over it, even though I’ve put a lot of energy and prayer into getting over it. How do you get over it when it involves your child? Before you judge me and assume that Mattix rec’d the kind of care we expect from an orphanage in VN, the fact of the matter is that he did not and if I know you well enough to have shared more details, you understand. Anyway, if you’re not familiar with the condition, acropustulosis is a long term issue that some children who were INFESTED with scabies for an extended period of time can develop and deal with indefinitely. Yes, it will eventually stop recurring, but there’s no way to know how long  it will take and the pain and misery it causes in the interim just plain sucks for my little guy. You can barely see the skin on his hands and feet because the blisters have taken over so badly. He has hundreds of blisters on his hands and feet. They literally exploded in a 24 hour period. His body apparently stopped responding to the steroids we’ve been using for the past seven months, so we’ve had to move on to a much, much stronger steroid. And anybody who is not entirely comfortable with slathering very strong steroids all over an toddler’s extremeties (and body, both of which we’ve done intermittently since coming home) can probably understand my being upset. And yeah, I know that scabies are common in VN orphanages. If Mattix did not have to deal with so much more than the post-scabies issues, I could swallow this pill, but the fact remains that there is much, much more and it’s not just medical/physical. So, yeah, I’m angry for my baby. That’s all I have to say about that at the moment. At the moment.

We are very fortunate to have a pediatric dermatologist who is from Ethiopia and who travels there frequently. In fact, he just returned from his most recent trip. Therefore, he is familiar with this condition that is not at all common in the states. As my friend Karen knows all too well, because this isn’t common, it is easily misdiagnosed and mistreated. And again because it’s so uncommon, we had a standing room only audience of doctors and residents at our appointment today who wanted to view it “in real life” at this stage (I have no problem with that, by the way, because if seeing it allows just one doctor to be able to properly diagnose it in just one child in the future, it was well worth the minor inconvenience). I didn’t take a photo to post b/c quite frankly, it bothers me that much. Maybe tomorrow, if it has begun to heal a bit. They certainly took enough photos for all of us at the appointment today. His hands, feet, wrists, and ankles look terrifying and the pain that it is causing Mattix his horrible. We’re hoping that none of them become infected again, thus necessitating another long bout of strong antibiotics and more pain.  I had to dose him heavily with Benadryl tonight so that he could get to sleep because the itching and burning are that intense. Then I had to stand over his crib and rub his little tummy while he cried his eyes out until he fell asleep. My heart hurts.

And on that note, I’ll wrap it up. Thanks so much for the questions! I was going to start answering them today, but I got a bit long winded – surprise, surprise - so I’ll do that tomorrow. Expect a few posts in a row. I hope everyone is having a great week!

Questions? Anybody? Questions?

So, I’m leaving for a few days tomorrow morning. My mom and I go to Laguna each summer for an awesome mom-daughter trip. We always have sooo much fun. I’m not going to lie, though; I’m a little apprehensive about leaving Mattix right now. My mom was still offering me the cancellation option the last time I talked to her tonight because, even though I’m not talking about it much, she’s a mom and she knows.  Of course I’m not worried about how Mattix and Ed will do – I’m not married to someone I don’t trust with my kid(silly, you think, but I know there are couples like that). I’m worried because I’m the one constant in Mattix’s life. Regardless of Ed’s travel schedule, regardless of what’s going on, I’m here. Mattix is my buddy. He’s no longer upset at me. He’s very, very happy with me. For the past month or so, he is, by far, the happiest he has been since coming home to us. His happiness is infectious and amazing. I feel like he’s finally reaching a certain level of comfort and security that is allowing Mattix to be himself and truly enjoy his life with less uncertainty. He goes to sleep at night and knows I’ll be there when he wakes up, whether it’s in the middle of the night or the morning. He is back to giving me more kisses and hugs than I can count, especially in the last five days. He leans in for kisses – with the CUTEST face I’ve ever seen – frequently. He runs up to me and hugs my legs while he’s playing. These are things that some people take for granted because kids just do them. Well, at our house, these things are very, very significant.

I feel like he’s getting to be a regular old toddler, doing regular old toddler stuff, not worrying about the things that most children that age don’t even understand. Everyone who knows him well can see the happiness and security in his eyes, in his body language, in his behavior. There are a handful of people besides Ed and I that he see regularly and is beginning to recognize as significant people in his life, including my parents, my brother, a few friends. He’s becoming very affectionate with them, too, because he FINALLY feels more secure in his environment.  So, while I’m under no false pretenses that I’m the center of the world, I am worried that my absence for the next four days will cause him to feel insecure, and I hate that idea. That being said, I’m still going.  But I’m hesitant, which might explain why it’s after midnight and I have not packed, when I have to leave the house at 8:00 a.m.  I hate this feeling.

And on that note, I thought I’d hijack and idea I’ve seen on a few other blogs and ask if anyone has any questions I can answer. About anything. I tend to over share, so there might not be anything you want to know, but for the sake of my fragile ego, someone pretend they care and ask me something, please. It’s highly likely that I’ll answer anything, because if it’s not obvious, I’m a pretty open person. And like I’ve said before, I’m nearly impossible to offend. So, anybody? I’ll answer next week.

Why won’t he watch TV????

Am I the only mom on the face of the earth putting a tremendous amount of effort and energy into getting my kid to watch a little freakin’ television? I pulled his little rocking chair into the loft, put out a sippy cup of juice and snack cup full of Cheddar Bunnies, tried every last horribly annoying kid’s show known to man. Hell, I even gave the Telle*tubbies a try, and I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned how I feel about the Telle*tubbies before. I was hoping that he’d pick up Khai’s interest in Yo Ga*ba Ga*ba while we were in MO, but no such luck. What a letdown. And after today’s failure…well, I’m defeated.

Before you judge me, I’m not hoping to park Mattix in front of the television for hours or anything. However, this kid will not sit still and has NO interest in toys or children’s stuff whatsoever. I LOVED our time in MO with all the other kids b/c being around them 24/7 sparked an interest in toys for him. He played with actual toys sooo much while we were there, but sure enough, as soon as we got home, he was back to his regular old obsessions: laptops, cell phones, cordless phones, iPo*ds, and anything and everything that belongs to me, including my clean thongs that he so graciously unpacked from my suitcase and put around his neck. Yup, he came marching into my closet this morning to show me his handy work. Mattix has so many toys I’m actually embarrassed. I’ve bought anything and everything I can think of just hoping that something will stick. Before you suggest he’s overwhelmed with all the toys, I don’t keep them all out at once.

Speaking of this morning, off topic, but Mattix woke up at 4:30 a.m. I realize his body was still on St. Louis time and so he thought it was 6:30, but guess what? Mine wasn’t. I didn’t sleep on the plane, on the ride home from the airport, and I didn’t get to bed until almost midnight. Hello!

Anyway, the television thing. I just want to be able to put on a show for 20 minutes so I can take a shower or something. When I was trying to pack up and get my suitcases downstairs to leave for the trip (Ed was already gone), Mattix literally wreaked havoc on the entire upstairs. In less than 20 minutes, he had emptied two drawers of Ed’s clothing and thrown the contents all over our bedroom, torn apart TWO rolls of wrapping paper and then shredded the paper into a million little pieces, unrolled a toilet paper roll and…you guessed it…tore it into a million little pieces, emptied out my bin of wallets and hid them around the house, taken the phone – the one I had put in the middle of my bed so it would be out of reach – off the hook, unplugged my cell phone charger and buried it in the dog bed, and I don’t even know what else. This all happened in the 20 minutes it took me to finish zipping up my bags, drag them downstairs, and load them into the car. So, yeah, a little television is looking pretty. damn. good.

I know I’m not crazy. I walked into Karen’s house, Mattix and all of our stuff in tow, took one look around, and thought. “Ohhh no. This place may be baby/toddler proof, but it sure isn’t Mattix proof.” Baby/toddler proof and Mattix proof? Two very different things. Apparently, people with regular children are able to have things like books (gasp!) on bookshelves (double gasp!) and decorations and picture frames and all sorts of stuff. Every morning, when we would take him out of his crib, he would go for Karen’s decorative stuffed bears, make out with them, then make a valiant effort to sit his adorable-but-heavier-than-a-stuffed-bear-booty in their decorative chair. He does behave for the most part in other people’s homes b/c I must be that scary (I’m very serious about not letting my child run wild in others’ homes), but he still did his fair share of putting every last toy in a very unusual place. The one thing he was all over was “using his nose, not his hands” to enjoy her plants. One of my few rules/lessons that has stuck is smelling a plant or flower, not ripping it apart. He even taught Khai his trick.

So, anyway, any ideas? I could use ‘em.

On a different note, Mattix was amazing on the trip home. He woke up super early today, but took a three hour nap this afternoon and fell asleep around 8:00 tonight.  I was worried he’d still be on St. Louis time at bed time, but he ended up going to bed an hour later than usual (vs. the two hours earlier that I was worried about, based on the time difference). And I think that happened because he slept for three hours this afternoon and his nap started an hour later because we were running errands. Anyway, he was in a fabulous mood all day. Mattix may be the world’s worst sleeper (overall), but he is, without a doubt, the world’s best traveler (in the 18 month and under category, of course). He’s been on a handful of trips since returning from VN and I have to say that he’s such a great adventurer.  I love that because I like to have the option of going places.

And on that note, I’d better go to bed, just in case he’s still on St. Louis time in the morning!

So. Much. Fun.

We are having so much here…I don’t want to go home! On Friday night, we had Khai’s one year Referralversary party. Unfortunately, he went to bed before the fun even began, but Mattix knows how to party. I finally got to meet Gina and Keith (unfortunately, I still have to wait to meet Sam and Eli) and Allison and Chloe. It was very exciting for me. So much so that I knocked Mattix intot he pavement when I was running to hug Alison, causing a HUGE goose egg to form on his head. The good news is that he cried his eyes out. It’s good news b/c he got a goose egg like that in VN (his own fault, not mine!) and he didn’t even notice. The bad news is that it was terrible! The other family we traveled with also came over and brought their adorable daughters, one of whom they adopted from VN as well. Lots of trip memories, including our PTSD-inducing experience at the airport in Saigon when our travel agent didn’t show to help us get our entry visas. That actually reminded me to ask the agency’s VN coordinator about our refund of those fees that we paid. It’s only been six months. Done and done!

{doesn’t he look like he’s checking to see if anyone’s watching so he can do something wrong?!?!}

{the adorable ms. chloe}

{khai isn’t the only one who gets it prison style from mattix. nope. chloe is a lucky girl, too. mattix was actually laying flat on her back, hugging her. by the time i got the camera, he was in this position. i swear, did my kid do hard time in VN???}

{mattix, soaking up the girls’ attention}

{if you’re curious what is so intensely interesting, it’s a tea kettle. the highlight was when mattix came out of the kitchen, wearing it on his wrist}

Which brings us to Saturday and the picnic. Um, while it was really great to finally meet other families and people with whom I’ve corresponded but not met in person, I can’t say the “picnic” was what we expected. It was indoors in a large, concrete-ish building. I mention this b/c there were incredibly loud drums and music and it was very loud, which isn’t always the best combination for a room full of children who were adopted, some of whom have sensory issues. Sorta overwhelming. We spent a fair amount of time outside on the playground equipment. We did finally get to meet Brody and Ben (from The Ben Show) and their mommies. Ben and Brody are entirely adorable. Poor Ben wasn’t lovin’ the noise, either.

{don’t judge him. you’d look like this, too, if you were confined to a concrete building with loud drums. don’t mess with the mattix! be sure to note semi-healed goose egg above his right eye. i think it just gives him more street cred, so he should actually thank me for unintentionally slamming him into the concrete. i know, it’s horrible. i’m trying to make myself feel less guilty, okay?}

{in an effort to mitigate the effects of the noise, mattix drank an excessive amount of hard liquor. it made it difficult for him to focus as well as remain in a seated position, but i can’t blame him. by the end of the picnic, he was passed out on the floor of the wagon. ha ha. actually, he and khai really dug the wagon and by some stroke of luck, they sat there pretty calmly for an unusually long time. i’m not sure it was a stroke of luck so much as the sensory overload, but whatever the reason, it was sorta nice not to chase him all over the place for the entire afternoon.}

{khai, looking as cute as always. notice mattix is missing. he was passed out cold at the bottom of the wagon at this point}

{ed decided mattix’s nametag was not descriptive enough, so he replaced it with “supafly.” i think mclovin’ was already taken}

{playground pics. the humidity is as hard on mattix’s hair as it is on mine!}

Then we moved on to a BBQ turned pizza party (due to the weather) at our travel mate’s home. That was also a really good time. I’ll let the photos do the talking (a first for me).

{julia giving mattix a ride on the gator}

 

{khai, showing mattix how a real man takes a ride – notice the placement of hand}

{jenna, looking awesome}

{khai man, braving the slide}

{beautiful chloe, rocking the cutest pink outfit ever} 

{more of my baby}

 

Sunday was a “slow” but fun day. I had a not-so-fortunate celiac incident all night, so we didn’t do anything on Sunday morning. However, in the late afternoon, we went to the transportation museum. It was really, really cool (and hot)! Khai loooovvveeeessss trains; it’s so cute. Again, more photos…

{why can’t my kid look at the camera?!?!}

{khai and his awesome hair. this makes mattix jealous. the humidity doesn’t even touch him!}

{vogue! working it for the camera! in order to preserve his son’s manliness, andrew wants me to note that khai is actaully in the process of flinging a rock and that ed just caught the photo at the right moment}

{is this kid going to be the class clown or what?}

Sunday night, we hung out around the house and had lots of fun. Karen forced Andrew to taste test the “regular” old vodka against the Grey Goose. Andrew conceded to the virtues of Grey Gooose. Karen: 1, Andrew: 0

{cleansing his palate between taste tests}

{realizing that grey goose is indeed superior}

{proof that my husband and andrew are equally dorky. they played guitar hero all night}

 

 {and the best yet. my baby, passed out cold at the end of a few exciting days!}

Mattix’s new bed time: 3:00 a.m.

Update: Our agency mailed our dossier to Ethiopia on Thursday, so we’re officially DTE! We won’t hear anything further about it (no official login or anything), so this is considered the “beginning.” Very exciting!

Well, Mattix and I took our first flight “alone.” We’ve actually flown a fair amount since coming home from VN, but I’ve always had “help” in the form of Ed or my mom. Last night, we did it solo! I have to say that I rocked…at least until we got on the flight. I had the stroller, the car seat, a diaper bag and a rather huge carry on (not sure that bad boy would have fit in that little measuring box they use, but the airlines seem extra nice when you have a baby. I didn’t even have to pay for my one checked bag that was five pounds too heavy), and a baby, of course. Mattix was strapped to me in the Baby B*jorn, the car seat was in the stroller, the giant carry on was in the car seat, and the diaper bag was on the stroller handles.  I *sailed* through security. I had to take the ”system” apart,  take out my laptop, fold up the stroller, position the car seat, take off Mattix’s  and my shoes, pull out the freezer baggie of liquids from the diaper bag, and push it all through the machine. I think we had four bins in addition to the stroller and the car seat. I rocked. Really. We made it to the other side and I had everything back together in less than five minutes. A woman came up to me afterwards and said, “I was going to run up and help you b/c you had so much stuff, but you had it all together so well I didn’t even have a chance.”  Oh yeah.

I even managed to keep Captain Destructo semi-contained while we waited for an hour to board. It helped that there were a few young kids that kept him fairly distracted, although he did try to eat one nice girl’s ice cream.   The flight was a bummer, but at the same time, I appreciated it. Mattix had a cold and the pressure must have been terrible for his ears. I had given him Benadryl to help dry him up and knock him out. While it did a bit of both, it didn’t work as well as I’d hoped. He spent the first hour in the car seat, sleeping fitfully and moaning/whining in his sleep. It reminded me of the way he used to sleep when we came home from VN. After an hour, he really started crying, so I pulled him out of the car seat and he slept up against my body for the next two hours. He woke up crying four or five times, but it wasn’t that bad. It was actually very, very sweet. It reminded me of our time in VN, but the complete opposite.

When we were in VN, we couldn’t hold Mattix. I’ve mentioned that once or fifty times, I know, but we just couldn’t hold him. After our G&R, we had a seven hour drive in the van back to Saigon. At some point, we didn’t know what to do with him (he freaked out – literally freaked out – when we held him), so I basically held him down against me and he cried until he wore himself out and passed out. (BTW, we didn’t do this unless we had to – when we were in a car, at medical appointments, etc.) There’s a photo of him HERE (seventh from the left or fourth from the right), laying (involuntarily) against me. He hated it. He was miserable.  Last night, he slept like that on the plane – because he wanted to. He didn’t want to sleep in his car seat. He wanted to sleep against his mom. I held him against me for two hours while he slept and thought about how grateful I am. I’m grateful for so much. 

And then the plane landed and got-it-all-together mom disappeared. Two flight attendants had to help me off the plane and one carried the car seat all the way to the gate where Ed was waiting! Ha ha!  Mattix was good and dopey from the Benadryl, so I had to put him in the stroller, which meant I lost the holder for the car seat, which meant I lost the holder for the giant carry on. So much for my “it’s all under control” attitude! Oh well.

Our plane landed at 1:00 a.m. and by the time we made it to bed, it was 3:00 a.m. (1:00 a.m. “our” time at home). Mattix only napped for an hour in the stroller today and so right now we have one very, very tired, slap happy baby on our hands! He’s in the crib, singing, blowing zurbers, talking, and giggling. Been going at it for an hour and a half. It’s cute, really. Despite the crazy disruption in his schedule and the fact that he has only slept seven hours in the past 24, he has been in a great, fun, enjoyable mood all day. I love this kid.

We met Karen, Andrew, and Khai for dinner at a great VNese restaurant. Too much fun. We’re so lucky that this is the second occasion we’ve been able to spend time with them since coming home from VN six months ago. And Karen and Khai are going to come stay with us in August. Khai has doubled in size since the last time I saw him (April) and has lots of new words. I’m wondering what he’ll teach Mattix this time. Last time, it was walking, which was a very useful skill. I’m SO excited for this weekend. Below are some photos from today:

If you can handle all of the sexiness that is me, greasy from the humidity, platinum crusty hair slicked into a pony tail, squinting into the sunlight, at a bad angle, then keep scrolling (Ed’s looking equally attractive):

Let’s stick to photos of things that are actually pleasing to the eye…

{just before getting on the paddle boat at union station in st. lois}

{feeding the koi}

{playing with khai after dinner}

{hugging khai or showing him how things are done prison style. either way, it’s really cute. yeah, i know, i’m sick and wrong.}

{he’s so little! this outfit is size 12 months. i almost bought the nine month size (although the 6 month probably fit the best), but i thought he might “grow into” the 12 month by the time summer was over. not looking too good…}

I can’t even wait for the rest of our time here. Happy Friday!